RXhausted — Farah
Take 40 mg of Celexa
Take .5 mg of Xanax whenever needed
Try Serequel
No, don’t do that, and no more Celexa
Take .5 to 1 mg of Klonopin instead of the Xanax
(Xanax is good for about 4 hours, then it wears off, but Klonopin
lasts for 8 to 12 hours, so you’ll feel better, and you’ll sleep
again too)
Take 10 mg of Lexapro, then titrate up to 20 mg — this replaces the Celexa
Try Abilify, just 10 mg
Try Abilify again, just 5 mg
Try Abilify one more time, just 2.5 mg
Stop taking the Abilify
Take Gabapentin; you’ll go from 300 mg to 600 mg
Take 2 mg of Rexulti
Try Wellbutrin
Take Wellbutrin in the morning, and take everything else at night
Take 450 mg of Wellbutrin
Never mind, try 300 mg of Wellbutrin
Actually, let’s do 150 mg of Wellbutrin
For the decrease in libido, take horny goat weed and ginkgo biloba,
maca is fine too, but start with horny goat weed
To combat excessive drooling, hypersomnia, and flat affect, ween off of the Gabapentin
To relieve tremors and homicidal ideation, titrate off of the Rexulti
— please know that there might be withdrawals, including heart palpitations and sweating from breaking fevers
Have you heard of Latuda? Let’s start with 20 mg of Latuda
The pharmacy said you owed them $65 for 7 pills?!
Here: Take the 20 mg sample then the 40 mg sample then the 60 mg sample
You might need to take the 120 mg sample, but be sure to cut it in half
Tell me if you ever feel restless, nervous, or confused
Your insurance may or may not cover this
I have to prove that you need this, that it’s really working
No, we don’t work with Medicaid
Never have and probably never will
Anyway… Need any refills on those prescriptions?
Wanna take home any candies?
See you in two weeks!
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Farah is a leftist feminist writer from Los Angeles. She is passionate about mental health and frequently shares her experiences with the medical-industrial complex. Her aim is to shine a light on taboo and stigmatized topics while remaining as accessible as possible. She hopes to see socialized health care — including fully government-subsidized psychiatry, therapy, and pharmaceuticals — in her lifetime.